I’m on the train home from Glasgow listening to Shakira singing about her hips that don’t lie and trying to remember if I put the socks I got you for Christmas in my suitcase or my rucksack…or if I left them in my flat. (Hmm, I left them in my flat).
Imagine for a second that the phrases ‘I like you’, ‘I really like you’ and ‘I love you’ didn’t exist in the human language. Instead, you’d give a person a pair of your favourite socks. A pair that would look great on the person – fit them somehow.
Valentine’s Day would be a pure sock fest. Haha.
I got to dinner at a friend’s flat the other night cold and wet. Anna gave me a pair of socks and Rebeka handed me her hair dryer.
It’s late and I’m putting on my shoes. I return the socks to Anna, fish my gloves out the pocket, put one on and Anna stops me. She inhales sharp and excited like she’s just seen a magic trick – goes – ‘Your gloves! They match the socks’. She reaches for the socks I folded by the radiator, inspects how similar they are to my gloves. Rebeka comes, nodding, smiling, telling me the gloves and the socks are matching – same pink, same yellow stripe.
I got home that night with a new pair of socks for Christmas, feeling like two people I haven’t known for very long had been kind to me, had just said a kind of ‘I really like you’ in the biggest smallest way possible. These mince pies are my way of saying a big ‘I really like you’ in a small way (lol great transition).
A Christmas pudding, a bakewell tart, and a mince, pie walk into a bar. They get drunk and fall over each other in a big heap – these little tarts are a neat version of that drunk mess. A crispy, buttery, fruity, rich, not-too-sweet really, good drunk mess.
Assembly – this recipie is a coming together and the fridge is your friend. The fruit needs at least 2 hours to soak in the brandy and orange juice, but it’s best if you can leave it to soak overnight. The pastry and frangipane can also be made a day in advance and kept in the fridge until you’re ready to bake.
Shape – I don’t like pancake flat mince pies. So, these are deep. You want a large cupcake tray or a muffin tray for this recipe.
For the Fruit
350g dried fruit – I use a mix of dried figs, cranberries and raisins
Zest 1 large orange + 100ml of the juice
1 large banana – I promise it works
For the Pastry
175g plain flour
100g butter – cold and cubed
1 tablespoon + 2 teaspoons cold water
For the Frangipane
50g butter – softened
40g ground almonds
25g plain flour
pinch of salt
a drop of vanilla extract
Mix the dried fruit, brandy, orange juice and zest in a bowl. Cover and refrigerate for at least 2 hours but preferably overnight.
For the pastry, combine the flour and sugar in a large bowl. Add the cubed cold butter. Using your fingertips, rub the butter into the dry mix until it looks like fine breadcrumbs. Add the tablespoon and one of the teaspoons of cold water, then, using a knife cut through the mixture until it starts to clump together. Get your hands in and bring the dough together to form a smooth ball. You want a ball of pastry that cleans the side of the bowl with no dry flour visable. If it looks too dry, add in the second teaspoon of water. Wrap the pastry in cling film and refridgerate for at least 30 mins. You can leave it overnight if making ahead of baking time.
Make the frangipane. Cream the butter and sugar until fluffed up around the sides of the bowl. Add the egg and beat again until combined. Next, add the ground almonds, flour, salt and vanilla extract. Mix to combine. Then cover and stick it in the fridge until you’re ready to assemble the pies.
When you’re ready to bake, pre heat the oven to 190 / 170 fan. Grease a deep cupcake tray and line each indent with a strip of greaseproof paper. Set aside.
Strain the soaked fruit, keeping the liquid aside. Mash up the banana and mix into the drained soaked fruit. Set aside.
Roll out the pastry to about a 1/4 cm thick. Using a round cutter (about 10cm) cut out 12 disks of pastry, placing them in the cupcake tray as you go. Distribute the fruit filling between the mince pies (about 2 teaspoons in each). Now add a teaspoon of the reserved liquid into each pie.
Top each mince pie with the frangipane (you should get about a teaspoon on top of each), leaving a bit of the fruit visable round the edges. Scatter the tops with flaked almonds. Ideally, you want to put these in the oven a little cold, this’ll stop the pastry shrinking. If you have time/can wait, stick the assembled pies in the fridge for about 20 mins before baking.
Bake for 18 – 20 mins or until golden brown.
Allow the tarts to cool before lifting them out the tin and EATING with lots of cream. Mmmm cream.
I’ve sat with this brownie recipe, and the little intro below, for quite a while now. I’ve tested them A LOT and seems like now is the right time to send you the recipe… I think you should make them.
For the first half of July, I lost all my words.
Maybe that isn’t fair to say, maybe it was more, I lacked words.
Maybe it was more that I felt lacking in all the good things, like words. Haha.
It lasted two weeks and two days this time round. I’m learning that when this feeling comes along, I’m worse off trying not to feel it, that is, fight the feeling of lack so that I might be able to keep up with my un-lacking friends and family. Obviously, to fight like this would be anyone’s instinctive reaction. Thing is, fighting it results in the sad moment where the state of lack makes itself known to you as something much more fixed than a sad mood that could juuuuust about be subsided with will power alone. I’m learning that the lacking state is much less painful if I lead a ‘lacking’ way of life during these times while I wait for it to pass. It passed.
Like it always does.
Now I feel like I’ve got words coming out my ears lol so I can write about these brownies I made during those 2 weeks, while Egg sat on the kitchen counter, patient with me in my lacking state, eating bread.
I hope that these pics can give you some of the good things if you feel lacking in them? Look into that chocolate abyss…mmmmm. These brownies are incredible. Rich, very rich, like molten chocolate pudding scooped straight from the oven or like smooth chocolate fudge once cooled with a wafer-thin crispy top, exactly the kind of top you’d want on a brownie. The raspberries and pistachios were Egg’s addition, I’d really recommend not leaving them out, you need something to cut through the pure fudge of these brownies.
Pistachio Notes – they are spenny spenny spenny. But we were celebrating me being very sad and Egg’s exciting love life… Any other (less expensive) nuts will work.
300g dark chocolate
250g unsalted butter
400g light soft brown sugar
5 medium eggs
1 tsp vanilla extract
1 tsp salt
100g buckwheat flour – plain flour works perfect in these. The buckwheate flour has the benefit of making these brownies gluten free.
50g cocoa powder
30g pistachios – finely chopped
150g raspberries – if you wash these make sure to dry them a bit before adding them to the brownie batter.
Pre heat the oven to 180 (160 fan oven). Grease and line with grease proof paper a 23cm square tin. If you don’t have this sized tin, find one of similar dimensions and keep an eye on it during baking as the timing will be slightly different.
Chop the chocolate and butter into chunks, place in a large bowl. Fill a small saucepan with a little water. Set the bowl of chocolate over the saucepan making sure the bottom of the bowl does not come into direct contact with the water when rested over the pan. Heat on a stove top on low/medium, stirring the chocolate occasionally until melted. Alternatively, put the chocolate and butter into a heatproof bowl and leave in the oven for a few minutes. Once melted, set aside.
In a separate bowl add the sugar, eggs, vanilla, and salt. Whisk these together until combined and a little lighter in colour (about 2 mins with an electric whisk).
To the egg mixture, add the melted chocolate, sift in the flour and cocoa powder and whisk to combine.
Pour the batter into the prepared tin, sprinkle with pistachios and scatter in the raspberries, submerging a few in the batter so they don’t all rest on top.
Bake for 40 (yes, 40) minutes, until the edges are set and a little cracked, but the centre still has a slight wobble. These brownies seem uncooked when they come out the oven, because of how wobbly the centre is, that’s how you want them to look. I promise they will set to be sliceable and perfect. Allow to cool completely in the tin before slicing.
Eating Notes – If you can’t wait for the brownies to cool, they have a molten chocolate cake vibe scooped out the tin fresh from the oven. It’s peng but don’t expect this way of eating or serving them to be neat. The rest of the brownies will be set the next day… so, two desserts in one.
Baking Notes – If they don’t set, it means you have underbaked them haha. They’ll still be great, just stick the whole (cooled!!) tin of brownie soup in the freezer overnight. Set it on the counter the next morning to defrost and you’ll be able to slice your brownies. Store the tin of brownies in the fridge once defrosted.
This cake is an upgraded lemon drizzle. Soft on the inside with a crackly sugar and almond crust, soaked in a tart lemon syrup fresh out the oven.
I first made a version of it in May when me, Tiger, Jess and Sue were moving out our flat. Amongst the tins of chopped tomatoes and packets of rice left in our cupboards we had lemons, walnuts, ground almonds and some yoghurt in the fridge. I made a cake out of them. And it was PENG. So, I wrote the recipe on the back of a Sainsbury’s receipt and have fiddled about with it all summer. I’m still working off that receipt now, with all the changes to the recipe scribbled on top of each other.
The original cake – the May one – sunk slightly in the middle. I altered the recipe, so it rises…how you would expect a cake to rise, but I think the original sunken state is important to remember. This cake has a heavy heart.
It feels right that I’m only writing up this recipe now. It’s a cake that marks change, I think. Fitting – we’re now juuuuust about to fall into autumn and in about a week, I’ll be moving back to Glasgow, into a new flat, this time, just for me and Tiger.
Gluten and Dairy Free Notes – This cake does well being made Dairy Free by replacing the butter and yoghurt with DF spread and a DF yoghurt. I’ve also made this cake Gluten Free by replacing the flour with a gluten free plain flour. In both cases, you couldn’t tell the difference.
For the Cake
2 large lemons – zest of both and 2 tbs juice
60g greek yoghurt – any plain, thick yoghurt will do
180g butter – softened
200g caster sugar
1 tsp vanilla extract
1/4 tsp salt
3 medium eggs – or 2 large eggs
200g ground almonds
100g plain flour
2 tsp baking powder
1 tbs vegetable oil – 15 ml
For the Almond Topping
30g flaked almonds
30g caster sugar
For the Syrup
3 tbs lemon juice
1 tbs water
50g caster sugar
Pre heat the oven to 180 or 160 fan. Grease and line a 20cm/8inch round cake tin.
Zest and juice the lemons and set aside. The zest and some of the juice will be added to the batter. There will be enough lemon juice for the syrup you will make later, so don’t get rid of any at this stage.
In a small bowl or jug mix the yoghurt and lemon juice (2 tbs), set aside while you make the rest of the batter.
Beat the lemon zest, butter, sugar, vanilla and salt until just fluffed up around the sides of the bowl. I use an electric whisk for this. Next, add in one egg at a time, beating thoroughly between each addition.
To the butter mix, add all the other ingredients – ground almonds, flour, baking powder, yoghurt and lemon juice mixture and vegetable oil. Beat together just until a homogenous batter forms.
Pour the batter into the cake tin and top with the caster sugar and flaked almonds (30g of each). Bake for about 45-50 minutes, until a knife inserted into the cake comes out with a few moist crumbs. Check a little earlier if your oven runs hot.
While the cake is in the oven, make the syrup. In a small heavy bottom saucepan, mix the lemon juice (3 tbs), water and sugar. Heat on a medium/high heat, stirring occasionally until the sugar is dissolved. Bring the syrup to the boil and allow it to bubble for one minute. Set aside to cool slightly.
When the cake comes out the oven, pour over the syrup slowly, allowing it to soak in. Leave the cake to cool in the tin for 15/20 minutes before turning it out.
Mmmmm some peng cake. So soft, so sweet, so buttery, studded with strawberries and blackberries, covered in lime and raspberry jam icing.
I recently started my first job as a baker at an independent cafe in Glasgow called Kelvin Pocket. Lol I’m pretty proud of this fact, brings me a lot of joy. A guy called Paul owns and runs it. I really don’t know how he does it, he’s there 6 days a week and you rarely find him without a smile on his face. He also trusts me to bake things in his kitchen, for his business, which I think is a big deal. Maybe he doesn’t think too much about letting me bake for his customers in his kitchen, but I do.
The idea for this loaf came from a cake we make at the cafe. This cake, is really David’s cake. David works in the kitchen, who, along with Caroline, make producing well over 60 different baked goods a day look like something they could do in their sleep. Icing a cake takes them under 2 mins and putting together sweet bun dough can be done in about 7…. magic. I hope David doesn’t mind me pretty much copping his idea, I hope he finds it flattering instead.
I was a lil bit blown away when I watched Caroline and David put jam in the water icing for this cake in the cafe (hahaha I really am that easily entertained). I bought some back for the girls in the flat. It got squashed in my bag but they all went mad for it – telling, I think. This isn’t some fancy multi layered, french patisserie thing, it’s just really, really good cake.
I messed about with the ratios a lil bit, using David’s recipe as my blueprint, to produce his cake reincarnated cakeonmyface style. ah, the circle of cake life. While I was taking pics of this reincarnated cake I thought it looked like some kind of abstract painting, it was quite beautiful actually (lol, here we bloody go). I wasn’t the only one that thought this. I went past Katie’s flat and threw a bit of this cake at her to try while I was running to work. She sent me a message later saying ‘Emma says it is like gallery cake’. Emma is Katie’s sister, I’ve met her twice, about 2 years ago, but sounds like we see cake the same way.
For The Cake
125g unsalted butter, softened
225g caster sugar
Zest of 1 lemon
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
2 large eggs
140g crème fraîche
160g self raising flour
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
160g berries of choice, I use strawberries and blackberries
For The Icing
210g icing sugar, no need to sift it
1/4 teaspoon vanilla extract
pinch of salt
3 tablespoons lime juice, or lemon juice
2 tablespoons raspberry jam, or any other jam of your choice
water to reach the right consistency.
Pre heat the oven to 190 / 170 fan oven. Grease and line a 2lb/900g loaf tin with greaseproof paper, letting a bit of paper hang over the sides of the tin so you can lift the cake out later.
Wash and cut the berries into chunks. Halves and quarters is perfect, if you chop them too small the berries will turn to mush and vanish into the cake batter. Set the berries aside.
Using electric beaters, mix the butter, sugar, lemon zest, salt and vanilla extract until it fluffs up and starts to clump at the side of the bowl, about 1 min. Do yourself a solid and don’t tire your arm beating this for ages, you’ll get the exact same fluffy cake with no more than 1 min of mixing.
Beat in one egg at a time, making sure the first is fully incorporated before you add the second.
Tip the crème fraîche, flour and baking powder into the butter mix, beat together for a few seconds just until everything is combined.
Gently fold in the berries and pour the batter into the prepared tin. Bake for about 55mins or until the surface of the cake feels bouncy when pressed gently with your finger tips and a couple of moist crumbs cling to a knife inserted into the cake.
Allow the cake to cool for 15 mins in the tin before lifting it out to cool completely.
When the cake is completely cool, put all the icing ingredients, exept the water in a bowl and mix with a whisk or fork. Add a little (very little) drop of water at a time, mixing between each addition, until you have a thick icing that can be poured over the cake.
Allow the icing to set a little before cutting into the cake (or just, cut into it now.)
Hahahah I had to copy and paste ‘crème fraîche’ from wiki every time it appears in this recipe because I don’t know how to get the accents on my keyboard. I wanted you to have the authentic experience of reading ‘crème fraîche’, Joe, like in a real recepie book. Caitlin x
I attach a lot of my identity to the shoes I choose to buy and wear. I think you do to. It feels like something we quietly pride ourselves on. You helped me choose my first pair of Nike air max 90s. They were black and I accidently left them on a train home from Glasgow. I felt shy at school when all the other girls were wearing pretty boots, converse or vans while I was wearing my pink and white Puma Fast Riders. I remember looking down at my feet and feeling silly. Shame, If only I knew then that people would think I was really cool if I cut about in them at the age of 22.
Just have a think about wellies for a second – big old tubes of plastic. Lace up boots – long thin ankle holders attached to elongated rubber pancakes. The toe end of Reebok Classic Leather trainers are modelled on the Grinch’s curly toe feet and Sue’s slippers could be mistaken for 2 un-sliced Warburtons loafs.
I like the idea of a shoe in the shape of a doughnut. French people call their apple turnovers ‘apple slippers’, chausson aux pommes. This makes a lot of sense to me. I’d love to have apple turnovers on my feet. These doughnuts are a bit like slippers too. They are soft on the inside with plenty of airy pockets to slip your feet into. The crispy exterior would protect your toes from hard things and the sharp cherry jam glaze gives you a bit of fashion jazz. I don’t fill these doughnuts with feet though, as comfy as it would be, I fill them with a beautifully light cherry custard cream. I called the filling a ‘crémeux’ when I presented them to the girls in the flat because I used the word once and they got a bit obsessed with it. It means ‘creamy’ in French and describes this filling well. The base of the filling is a crème pâtissière, thick vanilla custard, which is folded through cream whipped to soft peaks. It feels rich and almost buttery but it’s light as a feather. I fold a bit of cherry jam through the custard cream which leaves a perfect sweet cherry taste after the creaminess has melted away.
Honestly, I’d be surprised if anyone actually follows this recipe, not that I wouldn’t love it if someone wants to – work away and power to you!! – but this is more for me to remember what I did and maybe for others to get a bit of inspiration. I’m sure the measurements are not perfect, they could be refined and tested many more times, but it’s as close to perfect as it is right now. The cream is also too special not to write down, you could chuck in any fruit jam which I find pretty exciting.
Jam Note – Make this the day before you want doughnuts, there is enough going on with dough frying to be making jam as well. I’ve included a quick recipe here for cherry jam which makes the exact amount you need for the recipe. This is a spenny use of jam, the amount of fruit you use will cost about £2.50. If you are tight on money or time, find the cheapest jam you can get at the supermarket.
Crème Patissiere Note – You make this thickened custard the day before you want doughnuts, so it has time to set. When ready to fill the doughnuts, you fold in the cream and jam.
Dough Note – The recipe for this doughnut dough is by Tessa from Now-Forager.com. I’ve made doughnuts quite a few times now and this is the best recipe I have used by far. It is also the fastest to put together. This is a soft dough; you will need a stand mixer to knead it.
Makes 7 Doughnuts. The ingredients list makes this recipe look much more complicated than it is. There are a few steps but individually each one isn’t complicated.
For the Quick Cherry Jam
250g cherries – cut into halves, pitted and with stalks removed
For the Crème Pâtissière – makes 400g
250ml milk – whole or semi skimmed
1 vanilla bean or 3/4 teaspoon vanilla bean paste – 1 teaspoon vanilla extractwill do perfect too
50g egg – about 1 egg
12g plain flour
25g butter – at room temperature
For the Doughnut Dough
170g milk – whole or semi skimmed
1 medium egg
50g plain flour
215g strong white bread flour
6g fast action dried yeast
1 1/4 teaspoon salt
42g butter – softened at room temperature
About 1L bottle of vegetable or sunflower oil for frying
For the Cherry Cream Filling
400g crème pâtissière
150g double cream
2 heaped tablespoons cherry jam
For the Cherry Glaze
2 tablespoons cherry jam – you can blend smooth with a blender, like I did, for a less bitty glaze.
250g icing sugar
juice of one lime or lemon
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/2 teaspoon orange blossom extract – optional
1/4 teaspoon salt
Water to get the desired consistency
The day before making the doughnuts prep the cherry jam. Mix the cherries and sugar in a heavy bottom saucepan. Put the pan over a medium/low heat and mash the cherries slightly with a fork to help them release some juice. Let the mixture bubble for about 20 minutes, stirring frequently. When the jam is ready it should be glossy and thick enough coat the back of a spoon. Transfer the jam to a clean jar or bowl and allow to cool. Cover and keep in the fridge until you are ready to use it.
Next make the crème pâtissière. It needs time to set so get this going the same day you make the jam. In a small saucepan, add the milk, vanilla and half the sugar. Mix and set aside. Measure out the egg into a mixing bowl, place the bowl on top of a tea towel on your worksurface. Now heat the milk mixture over a low/medium heat. While the milk heats add the rest of the sugar, the corn flour and plain flour to the bowl of egg. Whisk the egg mixture to combine.
Once the milk has come to a simmer keep a close eye on it, you want to catch it just before it reaches a full boil. It will simmer a little and then swell up a centimetre, now take the pan off the heat and slowly pour the heated milk into the egg mixture, pouring with one hand and whisking with the other. When all the milk has been poured into the egg, the custard will be very liquid. Pour the whole thing (egg and milk mixture) back into the saucepan over a medium heat. Whisk continuously until the custard has thickened to a consistency just thicker than mayonnaise, this will happen quickly. Remove from the heat and allow to cool in the pan for a few mins before whisking in the butter a teaspoon at a time. The crème pâtissière should now be thick and glossy. Transfer to a clean bowl and press cling film directly over the surface of the crème pâtissière, this will prevent a skin forming over the custard as it cools. Store in the fridge until ready to use (no longer than 3 days).
The next day make the doughnut dough. Put all ingredients for the dough into the bowl of a stand mixer fitted with a dough hook. Mix the ingredients on low speed to combine, then increase the speed to medium and mix for 7 mins or until the dough is smooth, glossy and has come away from the sides of the bowl. This is a wet dough and will feel tacky. Transfer the dough to a lightly oiled bowl. Cover with cling film and let it rise until doubled in size (about 1 hour).
When the dough is almost doubled, fill a large heavy bottom saucepan halfway full with vegetable or sunflower oil. You need at least a 2-inch depth of oil for frying. Attach a sugar or deep fry thermometer to the side of the saucepan and heat the oil to 177C.
As the oil heats, prep for frying. Line one baking tray with greaseproof paper, you will use this to put the doughnuts on before frying, and another tray with kitchen towels or toilet paper (lol), you will put the doughnuts on this tray after they have been fried. Set both trays aside.
Tip out the doughnut dough onto a well-floured worksurface. Sprinkle some flour over the dough and your rolling pin before rolling the dough to 1/2 inch thick. Use a 3-inch round cutter to cut out 7 doughnuts. Place them on the greaseproof lined baking tray. Cover the tray loosely with cling film.
When the oil reaches 177C, use a slotted metal spoon to gently lower 2 doughnuts into the oil. Fry the doughnuts for 2 mins on each side until deep golden-brown. Remove from the oil with the slotted spoon and place on the kitchen towel lined tray. Allow the oil to come back to 177C and repeat the process until all doughnuts are fried. Allow the doughnuts to cool completely before filling (about 1 hour).
Make the cherry cream filling. Whisk the cream to soft peaks and set aside. Use a spoon to work the crème pâtissière back and forth to loosen it up a bit. Heat 2 tablespoons of cherry jam on the hob or in the microwave to loosen it. Gently fold the loosened crème pâtissière and cherry jam into the whipped cream. You can strain the cherry jam through a sieve if you do not want bits of cherry in the cream.
Pierce the side of each doughnut with a knife and wiggle it about to create a hollow space for the cream. Have a deep side baking tray ready for the filled doughnuts (they need to be kept upright so the cream doesn’t escape). Fill a piping bag or sandwich bag with the cherry cream and cut a small hole in the tip of the piping bag (or sandwich bag). This is a loose filling, don’t expect this piping to be a clean process, the only way to be here is a bit messy. Hold a doughnut like you would a glass, wedge the tip of the piping bag into the hole and slowly squeeze, pulling the bag out the hole as you feel it balloon with filling. Sit the filled doughnut hole-side-up until you are ready to glaze it. Repeat until all doughnuts are filled.
Make the cherry glaze. Put all ingredients for the glaze in a bowl, add a teaspoon of water and mix. Add a drop of water at a time until you reach the consistency you like. For icing like mine, you want a thick ribbon of glaze to fall slowly from a spoon pulled out of the glaze.
Dollop a spoon of the glaze on each doughnut, you can guide the glaze gently over the doughnut, so it drips down the sides. Place on a tray before eating lots of them, very quickly. Mmmmmm doughnuts.
This cake is peng and also dairy free. This is the best chocolate cake you will ever eat and the only chocolate cake I will ever make. Mmm bold. A dark, moist chocolate cake flecked with orange zest, sandwiched together with an orange cream cheese buttercream and slathered in a chocolate mousse like fudge icing. You can’t always have your cake and eat it. But sometimes you can haha. So when the opportunity comes along you have to jump on it.
I’ve actually been drafting this post for about 6 weeks, I’ve gone through 29 different versions of this intro. Not because the cake is hard to write about (it’s actually very easy to write about how good this cake is) but because of the reason that I made the cake. That was harder to write about. I’ve realised there are some things that I don’t want to write about on here, and that day is one of them. Joe, you know why, and that’s good enough for me. So… cake.
Me and Sue spent a day making this. It deffo didn’t have to take that long but we really drew out the process. We adapted the cake from thetasteofkosher.com and the fudge frosting from loveandoliveoil.com. The actual cake part of this is honestly the best chocolate cake in the world, so moist and dark and deep, lots of layers to the flavour. You could eat the chocolate fudge buttercream straight out of the bowl with a large spoon, the trick is cream cheese. It does great things.
This is turning into a bit of a confessional post. The white buttercream in the centre is a tub of Betty Crocker’s ‘Cream Cheese Style Icing’, mixed with some orange zest and salt. We needed it to be dairy free and we didn’t want to make a liquid, yellowy icing that you get when you use df butter and cream cheese. Cheers Betty, you’re a legend.
Note on Cake Tins. This recipe will give you a 3-layer chocolate cake, using 3 7inch round cake tins. You can also bake this in 2 9inch round tins, just increase the baking time by about 10 mins. If you only have one tin, like we did, you can bake the cake in batches. As one cake comes out, remove from the tin straight away, wipe the tin, grease it again and pour the next round of batter in. Honestly, with this batter there is no difference at all in the finished cakes if it has waited out for a bit before being baked.
For the Chocolate Cake
255g / 2 cups plain flour
395g / 2 cups caster sugar
75g / 3/4 cup cocoa powder
2 tsp cornflour
2 tsp baking powder
1 1/2 tsp bicarbonate of soda
1 tsp salt
470ml / 2 cups hot black coffee – just use cheap instant coffee here
120ml / 1/2 cup vegetable or sunflower oil
2 large eggs
2 tsp vanilla extract
Zest of 2 oranges
For the Orange Cream Cheese Buttercream
400g/1 tub Betty Crocker Cream Cheese Style Icing – achieved by walking to your local supermarket
Zest of 1 orange
1/2 tsp salt
For the Chocolate Fudge Buttercream. This icing sets in about 20 mins so you can’t make it in advance. Only start this once you have sandwiched the cake layers together.
100g / 1/4 cup + 3 tbsp dairy free cream cheese – or regular cream cheese
100g / 1/4 cup + 3 tbsp hot water
2 tsp vanilla extract
1 tsp salt
285g dark chocolate
Pre heat the oven to 180 / 160 fan oven. Grease cake tins and sprinkle lightly with flour, banging the sides of the tin to remove any excess.
In a large bowl, mix all dry ingredients; flour, sugar, cocoa powder, cornflour, baking powder, bicarbonate of soda and salt. Set this aside.
Make the coffee. To 470mls water you want about 3 teaspoons instant coffee.
Make a well in the centre of the dry ingredients and add in all the wet ingredients; coffee, oil, eggs, vanilla extract and orange zest.
Pour the batter into the prepared tins and bake for 25 mins or until a skewer inserted into the cake comes out clean. If you want even layers, weigh out the cake batter, you want roughly 450g in each tin. Once out of the oven allow cakes to cool completely before icing.
Prepared the orange cream cheese buttercream by mixing all ingredients in a bowl.
Place the first cake layer on the place/board/cake stand you want to serve the final cake on. Spread an even layer of the orange buttercream over the top of the cake making sure it reaches the edges of the cake. Place the next cake layer on top and repeat. If you want to, fill in any holes and smooth out any bumps in the sides of the cake with any extra buttercream. Place the cake in the fridge to firm up while you make the fudge buttercream.
For the chocolate fudge buttercream, use an electric whisk to cream the butter for 4 mins. You want a really fluffy consistency, I promise the time is worth it. If you don’t have an electric whisk, go at it with a wooden spoon.
Sift in the icing sugar and coco powder. Add in the cream cheese, hot water, vanilla extract and salt. Mix everything to combine.
Chop up the chocolate and melt it. I give the chocolate 15 second bursts in the microwave, stirring in between so it doesn’t burn. When this happens, the chocolate goes lumpy 😦 .
Pour the melted chocolate into the butter cream and beat everything together for another 2/3 mins. This whips air into the buttercream, giving it the chocolate mousse like melt in the mouth ting.
Remove the cake from the fridge and cover the whole thing in buttercream.
This is for our Grandparents, the most generous people I know.
I keep a lot of the letters Oma and Grandad write me. Some of these letters make me cry, it’s actually happened quite a few times now. Haha it’s becoming a trend. They don’t make me cry in a bad way. I’m not sure why this happens, I think it’s what happens when you feel a particular kind of love in your heart. I have a couple different stacks of the letters, in different draws and different rooms spread between Oxford and Glasgow. Do you keep the letters they send you?
I asked Oma to send me her recipe for Streuslekuchen, the stuff she always had about 3 boxes of stashed in the freezer just in case there was ever a…Streuslekuch shortage…? Haha can you image! What would become of the world. I got a letter a few days later of the recipe handwritten, in true Oma style.
If your name isn’t Joe and you don’t know what Streuselkuchen is – it’s a German vanilla sponge cake topped with a cinnamon sugar crumble. Cake-like but falls somewhere in-between the biscuit and cake category. It’s not the most jazzy thing in the world but you’re world will be brighter with it. You’ll eat one slice and then eat lots more in quick succession. My lil addition of apricot jam, was because we had apricot jam in the fridge. Feel free to leave it out.
For the Streusel – Depending on the size of your tin, you may end up with extra. Stick it in the freezer to use another day. Or um eat it?
200g flour – I’ve made it with plain and self raising, there isn’t too much difference here
1/2 tsp cinnamon
125g butter – fridge cold and cubed
1/2 tsp salt
500g self raising flour
200g butter – softened
1/2 tsp vanilla extract
Apricot jam – a couple of tablespoonsif you want to use
Icing sugar to serve – 2 ish tablespoons. This bit is v important. Oma never made Streuselkuchen without a thick powdering of icing sugar, it doesn’t taste the same without
Pre heat the oven to 190 / 170 fan. Grease and line a shallow 20 x 25 cm tin. A 20cm square tin will work just as well. This is a forgiving cake, so work with what you have.
Make the streusel. Put the flour, sugar, cinnamon and cubed (cold) butter in a bowl. Using your finger tips rub the butter into the flour mixture. You are looking for a rough texture, with smaller and lager bits of crumble. Put the bowl in the freezer or the fridge while you make the cake.
For the cake, measure out the flour, add the salt and set aside.
In a large bowl, cream together the butter, sugar and vanilla until lighter in colour and fluffed up around the sides of the bowl. I use electric beaters but a wooden spoon will do it.
Add one egg and beat until fully incorporated, then the second egg and a table spoon of the flour. Beat again until the mixture has fluffed up.
Tip half of the flour and salt into the butter and egg mixture. Beat to combine. Now pour in the milk and add the rest of the flour. Mix until there is no more dry flour.
Pour the batter into the cake tin and smooth out. Spread the apricot jam over the batter layer if you are using. Follow with a generous covering of the streusel, you shouldn’t see any cake beneath.
Bake for 30 – 35 mins, until a knife inserted into the cake comes out with no wet batter.
Once cooled, remove from the tin, cover with sifted icing sugar and cut into big chunks.
Joe, I reckon you’ll say somethin like ‘mmm cake. Can we put some chocolate ganache maybe in place of the apricot jam?’ Love Caitlin X
I had an identity crisis yesterday. Did a HIT workout and then ate an egg white omelette…with no toast. Lol I’d rather eat a muffin, thanks.
Time the eating of these right – not too hot to burn your mouth, not too cold to firm up the chocolate – and you get the most amazing little pockets of melted chocolate hiden in swirls of sweet banana cake.
I developed this recipe from a very old baking book that mum had on her shelf. It’s the kind of baking book where desiccated coconut and glace cherries are put on everything, and all the pictures have a kind of yellow tint to them. The recipes in this book are simple. They say things like ‘combine all of the ingredients, smooth into a tin and bake for 50 minuets.’ or ‘Once you have made the cake, ice it.’ In the spirit of this baking book, I’ve made this recipe really quick and easy. Have a good muffin!
Note on tins – This recipe makes 6 large muffins. If you’re using more of a standard cupcake style tin, expect to get about 12 muffins from the batter. Just remember they will need less time in the oven.
240g mashed banana – about 2 medium bananas
185ml / 3/4 cup milk
60g / 1/4 cup melted butter
1/2 tsp vanilla extract
185g / 3/4 cup + 3 tbsp caster sugar
1/2 tsp salt
250g / 1 1/4 cups + 1 tbsp self raising flour
1/4 tsp baking powder
For the Chocolate Batter
60g / 1/2 cup + 1 tbsp cocoa powder
120g / 3/4 cup dark chocolate, chopped – milk chocolate will work just as well
Pre heat the oven to 190C / 170C fan. Grease 6 miffin holes in a muffin tin.
In a large bowl, mix all the wet ingredients together; mashed banana, eggs, milk, melted butter and vanilla extract.
To this, add all the dry ingredients; sugar, salt, self raising flour and baking powder. Mix everything together to combine.
Pour half of this batter into another bowl. Add the cocoa powder and chopped chocolate. Give it all a mix.
Alternating between the two batters, spoon blobs of the cake mix into the muffin tins until they are 3/4 full. Using a skewer or knife draw a figure of eight through each muffin, this will give you the swirl effect.
Bake the muffins for 25 mins or until a skewer insterted into them comes out clean.
Cake On My Face is one T O D A Y boiiiiiiiii !! Happy Birthday to us! lol my nose and your arm got a bit of a camio.
Wow, big moment. We have a bigger family than we did a year ago, more than two readers actually (mum, dad, I’m lookin at you). Let’s give our hundreds of readers some reviews of our birthday cake; ‘Really good‘ – Mum. ‘The texture of the cake with the cream is really good‘ – Joe. Brilliant, that concludes our review section.
I know you would’ve preferred a chocolate birthday cake Joe but there is a big Chocolate Orange cake coming soon on here and I got in my head that I wanted to recreate the ricotta cake I made for mum’s last birthday. It was a peng cake creation but I didn’t write down how I made it, so it’s sort of remained a mystery cake. Well, I have recreated it for us, and this time I wrote down the recipe.
This cake is really good on its own, dust it with some icing sugar and it’s a moist and buttery dream. But the rhubarb cream is really beautiful with this cake, lil bit tart, lil bit sweet and paired with the cake it’s a rich, light and buttery combo. I’ll explain my thinkin behind the rhubarb cream. I’m not a huge fan of buttercream on cake if it isn’t chocolate or creamcheese based, so rhubarb buttercream wasn’t gunna happen. I was looking through some old baking books and every single cake in the book, other than muffins, was called a gateau. Lemon gateau, chocolate gateau, blueberry gateau, passionfruit gateau, tropical gateau (by tropical they meant mango)… replace the word ‘gateau’ with ‘cake’ and that’s pretty much what they were. Thought this really elevated the vibe of the cake. I worked out the gateau component of the cake was cream. No cream, Cake. Cream, Gateau. Instead of buttercream or icing, they covered their cake layers with a flavoured double (heavy) cream. So I made us a Gateau for our birthday.
My instructions on how to ice the cake are pretty lacking, so here is an informative picture guide detailing how I ice cakes.
This cake will keep in the fridge for about 3 days, so eat it fast!
For 2 round 8inch Ricotta Cakes
125g unsalted butter, softened
200g caster sugar
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/4 teaspoon salt
150g ricotta cheese
20g (1 tablespoon) milk
50g wholemeal flour
150g plain flour
2 teaspoons baking powder
1/4 teaspoon bicarbonate of soda
1/4 teaspoon cinnamon
For The Rhubard Sauce – can be made up to a week in advance, just keep it covered maybe?
200g rhubarb, chopped into small pieces
1/2 teaspoon cornflour or plain flour
For The Cream
600ml double cream
a splash of milk
Preheat the oven to 180 / 160 fan oven. Grease and line two 8 inch round cake tins.
Cream the butter, sugar, vanilla and salt for 3 mins until pale and fluffy, it’s easiest to use electric beaters here but you can also use a wooden spoon. Add 50g of the plain flour and one egg. Beat together to incorporate. Add the other two eggs, one at a time, beating to combine until you have a glossy and fluffy batter.
Mix the ricotta and milk in a small bowl and set aside. In a separate bowl (sorry, washing up, but it’s worth it), sift in the remaining flours, baking powder, bicarbonate of soda and cinnamon, adding back any bran from the wholmeal flour that the sieve collected.
To the batter, add the flour mixture in three goes and ricotta in two, beating inbetween each addition, starting and ending with flour. Pour the batter into the prepared tins and bake for 50/55 mins, until a skewer inserted into the cake comes out clean. Allow the cakes to cool completely before icing.
For the rhubarb cream. Add the rhubarb, sugar and a splash of water to a small sacupan. Heat on medium, until the fruit softens and bubbles (about 4 mins). You may need to help it by mashing it a bit.
With a whisk at hand, add the flour and whisk quite quickly to make sure the flour doesn’t clump. It’s fine if it does, no one is gunna see with all the cream. Once the flour has been incorporated, let the mixture bubble for another 10 mins or so. It’s best to watch and whisk this for the 10 mins because it’s not much fruit so it can burn easily.
Once the mixture is thicked and reduced pour onto a plate and allow to cool completely (about an hour and a half).
When the rhubarb sauce is cooled put it in a large bowl and gradually whisk in the cream. Once all the cream is incorporated add in the milk (not to much). If you’re worried this cream won’t be able to hold up the cake, dont worry, it will, it’s pretty sturdy stuff. Because the rhubarb is acidic, it thickens the cream so you won’t have to whisk this as long to get it thick enough to ice the cake. Keep whisking, either by hand or with an electric whisk, until the cream holds a stiff peak when you lift the whisk out the batter. Keep the cream covered in the fridge until you are ready to ice the cake.
Fill and cover the cake with the cream. If you want this really neat, you can trim the cake to get a flat top and even sides before you ice it. Give a generous amount of cream for the middle, sandwich the other cake on top and spread the whole thing with the remaining cream. Stick in a candle, call it a gateau and sing happy birthday.